15000 views is the power of linking pictures on the internet

So, yeah, discovered that there were 15,000 hits this year on top of 0 new blog posts.  Hope you folks enjoyed our archives! And by archives, I mean the pictures we put up.  I’m quite positive nobody who came here has any idea what we’re talking about! And it makes me laugh quite frequently, so keep on showing up and we’ll keep on not doing anything! (Unless some incredible outpouring of public request causes us to come out of retirement) 


Here’s to a brilliant 2013. 

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2011 in review

Our only problem with this report is the lack of references to Pen Pen.

Otherwise, thanks for making the first year of Everything is Evangelion so great!

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2011 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

A New York City subway train holds 1,200 people. This blog was viewed about 8,100 times in 2011. If it were a NYC subway train, it would take about 7 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

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Catvelion Odyssey Continues

Rocket, our healthy, juvenile (though listed as 1 year old since we cannot find the previous owner to verify age) black cat with white paws and adoration for boxes.

Hey everyone Perch here to give you an update on our newest correspondent Rocket (formally known as Sammy) the ex-stray. To give people tuning in this week an update Rocket has gone to the vet and is a spry not-quite-one year old spayed female cat that we picked up off the mean streets of Suburbia, I mean, Tokyo 3.

We’re going to try and not get ranty about how fucked up it is that someone abandoned a completely trained sweet, playful, kind kitten for over a week. Or how there has been no response to the ad placed for their owner to come forward. We here at Evangelion obsession station recognize that sometimes it comes down to the hard sacrifices of feeding yourself or giving up a beloved animal, but we still find it disgusting that Rocket was abandoned, especially since we live in an area with no-kill shelters and given Rocket’s age (still a juvenile in cat time) and sweet disposition she would have more than likely been adopted quickly into a new and loving home.

1. If Evangelion was animated with Cats Rocket would be the go-to new recruit Shinji who falls in line with our other cats….Shoe (Rei) and Poe (Asuka).

Poe in our 8 year old tiny black cat and Shoe is our 10 year old 22 pound torso sized bigger baby.  And Shoe’s stuffed penguin Professor Pennyworth.

Paw power!

2. Shinji is abandoned by his father and only called on when he’s needed to save the world in a giant mech run on electricity and the soul plug of his dead mother. Rocket was abandoned by her ‘parent(s)’ and when they call on her to save the day Kin and I will be sure to knock them out and steal all their tiny mech suits.

We will totally use our mech cat army for good though. We swear.

3. When Shinji and Asuka meet they don’t get along, their behavior only gradually getting slightly less hostile and more choke-a-bitch as the series gets on. Poe wants to murder Rocket because shes’ the queen around here and no upstart is going to stand in her way.

We’re pretty sure it’ll get better without the apocalypse.

4. In Evangelion there is a vat of Rei clones lined up for various uses; piloting, plug suit dummies, weird bandage fetish enthusiasts on the internet. In Catvelion Shoe sheds enough that we’re convinced there’s an army of tiny Shoe’s hiding around the house waiting for the appropriate moment to strike.

5. In Evangelion Tokyo 3 is a city beset by a fairly polite group of angels who take turns trying to beat it up and get their head boss angel back. In Catvelion Suburbia is beset by holiday shoppers who will pepper spray you as soon as look at you and Santa yields a crowbar.

Also cats, in boxes, or holding penguins. It’s totally the same thing.

In conclusion I give our reality’s feline protectors 1 Pen-Pen’s. They’ve seen my Evangelion toys and they’re not impressed. Though they totally attack the screen whenever an Angel comes on and that makes them 50% more useful than Shinji.

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This week we have a special guest writer

Meet Sammy, a stray from the mean streets of Tokyo 3, who knows that Everything is Evangelion.  Case in point: That white patch on her adorable chin?  Reminiscent of the ray of hope that Shinji keeps alive in spite of his otherwise black life.  Note how she’s rubbing up on our leg.  Clearly just like Asuka rubbed up on Kaji.  Oh yes, we may have picked up this poor abandoned kitty because we felt awful about it huddling around in the northwest cold and damp winter, but we kept it in the house because it gave us a detailed report of the similarities between Fancy Feast and the Seele organization.

We’re currently trying to give it a bath for the fleas and seeing if there are people who can give it a good home, we’ll be back for a christmas/almost a year special next week.

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BRB, sucking dragon souls

That’s Lydia on the right and my personal Draemora Lord servant on the left.  I named him Phil.  Sir Phillipin von Hurtysword the XXIV to be precise.

Have something new for you soon.

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We get comments here all the time.  And frequently they have insightful questions about the content of our site.  Questions like, “Are you a crazy person?” or “Nice blog, check out my cheap deals on electronics!” and my favorite “How far back does the influence of the incredible Evangelion go?”  We’re still researching how deep this Rabbit Hole goes, but one thing we can say:  At least back to the 1600s.  I bet Asuka cut the turkey while Shinji tried not to run away from the mashed potatoes!

If you’ve never experienced it, Thanksgiving is the American national holiday (Canada has it too, but they jump the gun) celebrating the day some white people scammed some native people out of enough food to regain their strength.  They then used said strength to kill said native people with a most hypocritical vengeance.  But the day itself is to symbolize working together and to be thankful for the blessing that you do have.  And it is in that spirit that we celebrate today.

1) Pilgrims versus Seele.

-You think when Nerv approached Seele they were like “We’re trying to figure out the best way to screw you guys over!”  Heck no!  They were all: “Hey, we need your resources so we can work together for the greater good of both of us!”  Yeah, exactly.  And then Nerv gave Seele a bunch of pox ridden Eva Pilots.

2) Thanksgiving is represented by the Turkey, the one bird that can satisfy our ravenous yearly hunger.  Evangelion is represented by Shinji, the one being that can satisfy our ravenous Angelic hunger….

-Hunger for ass whoopins?  Not really.  I mean, how many angels tried to take a bite out of Shinji, huh?  Hell, even Unit 01 liquified and absorbed him once.  Shinji’s like an all white meat buffet to these things.  He’s been tenderly basted in fear and paranoia, and fed a steady diet of delicious neglect and mental abuse.  The constant physical strain is like stuffing!

3) Thanksgiving is about getting together with your family. Those incredibly annoying and disturbing people.  Kind of like how Evangelion was about bringing families together.

In both cases, your families should probably just keep doing what they’re doing.  Separately.  And yet, for the greater good you put up with each other.  I know I’m looking forward to my dad commanding me to hop into the family mech after lunch.  He knows how much I hate it.  Smells like liverwurst in there.

4) The original pilgrims made several journeys to America.  The angels came several times to assault earth.  Coincidence?  Obviously not.

-Maybe the angels were just looking for a passage through the earth to some other celestial body.  They just kept getting hung up on all those lousy indiginous peoples.

5) In Evangelion, all of the doings of Nerv were foretold in the bible.  The pilgrims were literally religious fundamentalists following their own guide.

-And though I’m sure their version of the bible didn’t have the bits about everyone turning into goo, they still had some version of the bible.  A lame version, but it’s cool. We don’t judge.

In conclusion, we give Thanksgiving 4 hams out of Turkey… okay sorry, foods cooking and I’m getting hungry.

Have a happy Thanksgiving folks!  Hug someone!

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I didn’t forget!

It’ll be up in a few hours when it’s Thanksgiving proper

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